Welcome to the wedding blog for Megan & Tommy!

Tuesday, September 1, 2009

"Don't Judge A Book By Its Cover"

(Just so it's clear, I'm not writing this out of anger. It's out of complete frustration that people can't seem to realize they don't know everything that is going on in other people's lives, that they can't seem to mind their own business, and they can't seem to stop thinking the worst in others. I thought long and hard about posting this, but I'm glad that I am. I want EVERYONE that I know to read this so they are well aware that what they are doing is WRONG)

Ever heard of that saying? I'm sure we all have. It's a good rule to live by even though we tend not to. It's only human nature to judge people just by what we see, but that's only an excuse to keep doing it. We all know we shouldn't judge yet there are still so many who do it regularly.

The reason I say this is because I'm fed up with people in our lives who judge us just based on what they see, hear, or assume. There is SO MUCH everyone around us (including close friends and family) does not know. But do they try to find out the whole story? Do they come to us to see whats up? NO! They go to other people or form their own opinions on what THEY think to be true. How is that ok? It's not. Only God can judge us so why are you, an imperfect human, doing it? You're in NO position to judge us, or anyone else for that matter, and just because something SEEMS a certain way it doesn't mean it's accurate.

Let me give an example:
Say you find out "John", an acquaintance of yours , killed someone. What's your first reaction? Probably something very negative because killing another human is a very serious crime. BUT, that's not the whole story. This is just what one person told you, but you still take it as fact, don't you?

Now lets say you hear the same story from a different person, but now you're given a little more information. This time you find out the "reason" why John did what he did. Lets say he killed this other person because they got into a fight and things just got out of control. John's temper flared and his anger turned to rage, which ended up with the death of the other person. What's your reaction now? Probably about the same because that's still not a good reason to kill.

Now here is the real story. John comes home to find that his home has been broken into. As he's looking around in shock at what has happened, he hears crying and a scream coming from upstairs. He rushes to the second floor to find blood on the floor, items broken, and everything destroyed. He goes into a bedroom, his children are crying hysterically, his wife is bleeding and the home invader is in the process of doing something horrific with a weapon in his hand. John picks up something off the floor, runs towards the criminal, and knocks him out. Somehow (because I don't want to be too graphic) this man dies but it wasn't "just because", it wasn't because he lost his temper, it was for self-defense and his intention wasn't for that man to die, just to get him away from his wife and keep his family safe. Now that you know the truth, what is your reaction? I bet its the complete opposite of the first two situations.

Even though our situation has nothing to do with the killing of another person, the "moral" of the story still applies. No one knows the whole story of what is going on in anyone's life or why things are or aren't going the way they should. A lot of things are out of our control yet we're still being blamed for it and are criticized, looked down upon, and judged.

If anyone wants to know whats going on with us, or why we're not married yet, ASK US! Don't ask our parents, don't ask our friends, don't ask anyone BUT US!!! Because WE ARE THE ONLY ONES who knows EVERYTHING that is going on in OUR LIVES! And I can guarantee that NO ONE knows the whole story because NO ONE EVER BOTHERS ASKING US! They ask other people that they think are a reliable source because of their relationship to us (but if you only knew how those people really are) If you want to know the truth, USE YOUR BRAIN AND GO TO THE SOURCE!!! But even then you will never know the whole story or exactly what is going on. But at least going to the source will be the most accurate one you can get.

I'm sorry to have to say this but the fact that it keeps happening is hurtful, upsetting, and disappointing. I'm not going to just sit back and take people speaking negatively of us or think things without knowing all the facts first.

So when the time comes and you receive and invitation to our wedding, if you've EVER thought negatively of us, gossiped about us, looked down at us, didn't take our engagement seriously, or anything along those lines, DON'T EVEN BOTHER COMING because we will not waste our time or money on someone like that. And if that meant everyone we know, THEN SO BE IT. We will not associate with backstabbing, unloving, self righteous individuals if we can help it.

Just know, anyone who is judging us will be judged themselves.

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